day to day life stuff

"...you know what they say on the barstool, there's poor and there's poor."

I'm a few years behind the curve on these last few posts, I know, but I figured it couldn't hurt to bring it up again anyways.

I was feeling sorry for myself just now about my (very relative) state of brokeness, and found this online. I don't feel sorry for myself any more. It's a few years old, but timeless.

What it means: being poor.

Oh, and check out the comments at the bottom too.

...to Davis Square, that's why I've not been posting so much. Sorry about the lag.

Prepare for me to post a collection of recently discovered interesting things starting...now!

I found this great article on how to defeat verbal intimidation on Consumerist today: The Art of Verbal Intimidation : Learn it and fight back!

For example (I've added the quotations to make things more clear):

I once witnessed a perfect example of this from a work colleague who had a verbal attack instigated towards him by a senior manager. As the manager elevated his voice to declare dominance, my work friend simply said:

"I understand the concern. Though I do think you’re being very emotional right now. Let’s talk about this once you’ve had a chance to calm down."

The anger in the manager’s eyes grew ten-fold. In a desperate attempt to appear dominant, the manager further raised his voice and responded:

"No! We’re talking about this now!"

To which my colleague stood up, and responded softly:

"I will talk to you, but I will not let you shout at me. You are my boss and I respect you, but you are not my mother."

I've had a lot of problems in the past dealing with this sort of verbal intimidation, so it's always nice for me to receive a reminder of the right way to behave in these sorts of situations. Upon examination, it becomes clear that the most effective strategy is also the most dignified, compassionate, and manages to maintain one's confidence and composure.

Now, my life is complete.

I've been looking for some new roommates, 'cause the old ones were getting tiresome, and a found a few. Unfortunately, I've realized too late after doing some accounting that they are costing me more than my previous roommates! They don't seem to work, they eat a lot (and for some reason expect me to feed them), they sleep during the day, and they run around in the apartment at night, with no regard for my sleep schedule.

I even caught one trying to drink out of the toilet last night. Is that sick or what?

I was able to snap some pictures of them playing with a cockroach (gross!) and I figure I can use it to blackmail them into paying me some rent (see below). Although--I know it sounds kinda twisted, but hear me out--I figured out this scheme to get one of them sterilized without her knowing. Ha!

I just ended (perhaps not permanently) my relationship with the Park Slope Food Co-op. Unlike this chowhound writer or the author of this economically-based criticism of the co-op in Gothamist, I like the co-op just fine. I think it's a great place, and my beefs are greatly outweighed by what I think is great about the co-op:

1. you can get high-quality food for cheap,
2. you are supporting a successful alternative economic structure within the larger capitalist political economy we live in which is at least trying to put people rather than profit first (I won't get into an argument about how well it is succeeding),
3. point 2 is what enables point 1...not really a separate thing but I thought I'd mention it,
4. and, you can meet many interesting people there (and, yes, some nutjobs too).

Well, why am I leaving then? Because I just don't go there any more! I moved to Lefferts Gardens last Fall and now the only time I shop at the co-op is when I have my shift. It's inconvenient for me, based on where I live, and I end up going to the bodega across the street for my gallon of milk, cans of goya beans and tortillas or one of the many wonderful produce stands that line Flatbush avenue if I want good produce or funky hot sauce (those West Indians sure can make some tasty, spicy hot sauce...). I also get good-quality free-range and organic chicken or beef from the greenmarket in Union Square, or from Whole Foods (although that is pricey), because I work on 13th and 5th.

It just doesn't make sense for me to be a co-op member right now. I don't care enough, I'll admit it.

However, I did make sure and ask if I could come back into the fold without taking the orientation again...someday, co-op, you will be mine again, and welcome me back into your urban-hippie left-wing sanctuary, surrounded by faux-pâté, organic red-leafed kale, and Wild-caught non-exploitative Alaskan salmon jerky. *sigh*

1. sometimes it's winter and riding a bike in winter in the Northeast feels colder than at other times of the year
2. bicycle helmets have holes
3. a hat for under my bike helmet
4. not to shave my head the night before my shift when it is winter and I'm wearing my bike helmet without a hat underneath
5. also, having gloves is preferable to riding your bike hands-free and almost running over pedestrians and getting hit by cars
6. 6:00 AM shifts suck
7. sleep more the night before
8. extra cash because the stupid co-op doesn't take debit/credit cards STILL and that means I have to choose between breakfast cereal and salmon jerky (I chose the cereal, but that's really good salmon jerky they've got there and I wanted some)
9. a bigger backpack so I can actually carry the groceries I buy home
10. a rubber-band for the flimsy container blueberries are sold in so it doesn't open in my pack and dump the blueberries everywhere
11. to attach my bicycle pump to my bike frame so I have it in case I don't have a lot of air in my tires and I forget to fill them fully before I leave my apartment
12. to peg or roll up my right pants leg so it doesn't catch on the gears every other second
13. sometimes people coming up behind you really quickly when you've stopped to roll up your right pants leg are just trying to get to the bus stop real fast
14. mace

Finally!

I did end up in "Prospect-Lefferts Gardens." Here is the onNYTurf link to show you where I live, although I think it places me in the triangular island that contains a gas station rather than my building which is further east on the corner of Lincoln and whatever street that is that is on the other side of the triangular island.

Now you should come visit me. If you do I will cook for you, and we can hang out and listen to music and talk and have a good time. That's what I will be doing in my new apartment, a lot. I've already had Adam over as well as Jon and Pamela, and we had an amazing meal last night (home-made pasta...mmmm).

As my last post indicates, I am considering moving into an apartment in the area known as Prospect-Lefferts Gardens. I've been doing further reading on the area, most importantly trying to gauge how safe the area is. This turns out to be a complicated question to answer, as I had suspected.

I turned to Google--as I am want to do--and found a bunch of posts about the relative safety of PLG. First, I found a few contentious comment threads about it being the "same you'll-get-shot/no-it's-paradise loop" as one poster put it. This flame war got tired real quick, and lacked educational value to boot.

There was more substantial content on brooklynian.com, although the two big threads about Prospect-Leffert Gardens seemed to be pointing in two different directions as far as safety is concerned--one said PLG is a safe and pleasant place to live, the other says watch out for all the shootings and other danger. Which is it already?

The thread that suggests Prospect-Lefferts Garden is a dangerous area has a link to the NY Times online article about 2005 murders--there is a great Google Maps mash-up provided. Look at the South Brooklyn section, then enlarge the area directly next to the Southeast corner of Prospect Park to get an idea of where I'm thinking of moving. Yikes.

Of course, the crucial observation about the 2005 murder map in terms of PLG is that this is all black people killing black people (mostly young black men killing other young black men). This is pretty disturbing. The question then becomes, I think: instead of how safe will I be if I move to PLG, what affect is my moving to PLG going to have on the hood? Obviously I'm part of the gentrification vanguard. The realtor who showed me around suggested that I was the sort of person that she wanted moving into the neighborhood--the right sort of person. I don't even think she meant white; I think she meant someone capable of affording a one-bedroom at $850 a month. I'm guessing that for a lot of lower-middle income individuals or families, $850 a month is more than they can afford--or that it would be much more likely for a couple or small family to live in the space I'll be renting. So this is definitely a class thing, not a race thing (even though it is a race thing because class so neatly corresponds to race in this country and especially in this city).

What do I do? Move into a tiny room in a shared apartment for more than I can afford in a trendy, hip, safe (that word again) neighborhood, or move into a one-bedroom for less than I would pay for the tiny share in a neighborhood with a completely different class of people? How will I be perceived? Will I be personally safe? Will I be part of the community, will my friends come visit me, etc.? I don't know. I'm ready for a risk though. Selfishly, I think I may move to the one-bedroom. I'm just trying to figure out how I can make this selfish choice somewhat less selfish, or is it just rationalization to say that I'm enforcing the status quo just as much by staying in Park Slope and paying exorbitant rates? Hmm.

Anyways, I'll ponder that, but in the meantime here are some more links: A blog about the East side of Prospect Park, another by a gay man who likes to cook and hates Rachel Ray and lives in PLG, and last but not least the Google Maps-based "Prospect Lefferts users Mapping Project". Cool stuff.